Wednesday, August 11, 2010

best laid plans

i had great designs on regular posting as i began residency and i was off to a good start. but i ended up taking a huge emotional blow in my second week and i had to withdraw into myself simply to get up and go to work. so i quit writing. i also quit reading and watching tv or really interacting. i survived by text message and meaningful looks. i also lost weight, though i think lacking appetite isn't the recommended method.

i am improving. every day is better. i am still hurting. i will hurt a little for a very very long time. but i have not been taken down by anything yet and if you know me, that IS saying something.

on the up and up...ER was a good rotation. a great way to start - a chance to remember my basic skills. thank goodness. now if people would just stop coming to the ER for non-emergent problems. and if the ER staff would learn that abdominal pain is not a catch all and certainly does not include pelvic pain. those are different.

i am glad i didn't choose ER as a career though. and i wonder about the FM trained docs who end up doing ER. what was so unsatisfying about FM - where the idea is to follow the pts forever - that you have to go all the way to ER where you don't follow pts even as far as the door.

now i am on to OB which would be great if i weren't suffering for the sins of those who came before. long story. lets just say i am walking uphill both ways in the snow. but i get to catch babies, so that's fun.

1 comment:

  1. Hope everything is OK. I don't know why things have to be so hard, but you know how to live through this. You know how to come out the other side better and smarter for the experience. You've been through worse and whatever the situation, these folks don't know who they're dealing with!

    Thinking of you.